2-20 Lost in Purgatory
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| Sorry it is sideways. But this is my fashion statement. |
Around 10:30 pm Saturday night, I woke up completely when they told my neighbor they’d be closing the ward and we were all moving. I put my things back in my bag and fell back asleep until they came to move me. That ward was a six-bed room with three men, two women and me. My cubicle didn’t have a curtain, my neighbor was using it to double block his cubicle. My neighbor was also a bouncer, used to bouncer’s hours with bouncer friends who also keep bouncer’s hours. They were talking while I was trying to sleep. (It was probably like 8:30 at night, really.)
I fell back asleep waiting to be transported to a different ward. I got to my new ward around 11:30. They did all the usual things and shot some more antibiotics in my arm. Then the nurse informed me that in half an hour, I would be fasting and was there anything I’d like to eat or drink before then?
I had a glass of water and a sesame crackers. I passed out.
At 5 am, the nurse came back to wake me up. In an hour, I needed to be scrubbed for surgery, in a surgical gown and hooked to an IV with my antibiotics already pushed. I got up. I got my hands taped up again. Showering with plastic bags taped over both hands is really interesting.
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| I have no good hand |
To explain that, at this point, I have a bandage on my left wrist where I cut it and an IV in my right wrist. Honestly, the IV is the more painful and annoying of the two. The lock keeps catching on things and the tagaderm is tugging at my arm hairs. I can’t feel the parts that should hurt on my left hand, which makes it worrisome but less painful.
I got myself scrubbed eventually. I even washed my hair, sort of. I put on the paper underwear they provided. (I didn’t have a choice. The nurse stressed that point.) I put on the lovely purple gown they provided. I got back to my bed in time for my breakfast IV and antibiotics. I braided my hair and brushed my teeth (without swallowing). I almost felt human.
Seriously, though I am writing this in a light tone, Saturday was a really bad day. I was having random crying fits all day. I am incredible lonely and I want someone to take care of me or at least to be my advocate. I still don’t want to be here and I am still struggling with a lot of things, including some of the fundamentals like lack of sleep and food, but at least I’ve had one place to stay all day.
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| My Purgatory |
Since 6 am, I’ve been waiting for surgery. At noon, they told me I could eat lunch because the theaters are all full. I’d been pushed back to Monday.
I immediately pulled out my chocolate stash. An hour later, a different nurse came in and told me not to hold my breath about having surgery today because a trauma had come in the ER. I told her I’d been told to eat. She looked confused. She went to go talk to some people. She came back and told me I was right and she’d be talking to the surgeon, not the ones in charge of running each operating theater. I ate lunch. It was hospital food, but I was damn hungry.
It is now 7:30 pm. I’ve been playing computer games most of the day. When I got bored with that, I would go for walks or do yoga on the terrace. I found raspberry sorbet at the hospital store. That improved the world for an hour or two. I’ve gotten a lot of funny looks for my fashion choices today. I am wearing my black and pink flowered zuba board shorts, a white tank top, black flip flops and TED stockings. I have bandages on both wrists and I’ve been wearing my gown backwards like lavender jacket. People must think I’m nuts when I go wandering around in the hospital.
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| The terrace. This is what they call “outdoors.” |
My neighbor is a lovely woman who has an iPhone. We got to chatting, I was listening to her story and being interested and sympathetic. She’d been in the hospital for way too long and it’s looking like she’ll be here for awhile longer, poor woman. Then she heard me lamenting the lack of internet. She let me use her iPhone for a bit. Awesome!
One of the other women in my ward is actually more of a girl. I think she’s about 17 and has also been in the hospital for too long with very little chance of getting out anytime soon. I’ve offered to play cards with her, but her family is great about being there almost constantly during visiting hours. I’ll play after 8 pm tonight when they have to leave.
Our last roommate is a cranky old lady. She is not a happy camper, but she also sleeps most of the time. I think this room is a total promotion from the previous one. It is a Gynecological ward, but hey we’re all ladies here!
At midnight, I go back on my saline-by-IV diet. Hopefully tomorrow morning I will get surgery and the sooner I’m out of the hospital and into a hotel the happier I am.
I got the impression Medevacs were swank. This has been a nightmare.